Harry and Draco love each other by Perla Shumajer
by Ero-hime
Summary: This fanfic is not mine, I just translated it from Spanish. I warn you, the fic is BAD but hilarious.
1. Chapter 1

_This fanfic is not mine. But I had to translate it from Spanish, because it is just EPIC and I want English fans opinion! I suspect the author made it like this on purpose. Is one of those awesomely bad fics that make you lol. The author is Perla Shumajer._

Harry was wearing: blue shirt, green trousers and one of those checkered T-shirts that are now in fashion when Hermione, his girlfriend appeared. She has been his girlfriend for four months, they were in love and they wanted to get married but they couldn't do it because they were too young and because Draco was standing in their way of pure and devoted love.

Draco couldn't decide if he loved more Hermione or Harry. He absolutely loved and adored both of them, so he couldn't allow them to be together, he wanted them to be only theirs, that's why he tried to make them break up. One day, he made a decision: He loved Harry way more because of his cheeky attitude and because the thought his glasses were very sexy. Hermione didn't wear glasses and she was a mudblood so he didn't love her anymore.

One day, Draco said during their alchemy class:

-Hey Harry, can I have a word with you? Draco said and he blushed like a semi-ripe tomato.

And Harry replied: No Malfoy you hurt me a lot, I only talk to my girlfriend and my other and only half Hermione.

Draco got mad, REALLY mad, he pulled Harry from his hair and dragged him to the toilet where he raped him and said:

-You are gonna like it more than with that muddy -Said while he was taking his clothes off and Harry said he never had sex with Hermione.

-Then you are gonna understand what does make love mean.

Said the silverhaired guy and Harry doesn't want to do it but he liked what he was doing to him.

-Ummm I like it

Said Harry letting Draco do what he wants with him.

Herminoe went to the toilet looking for his four months boyfriend when she saw him naked with the silverhaired guy that hated her so much, the one who she was really in love before chosing Harry over him.

She stormed out of there crying, went to her bedroom, picked up her wand and pointed at her head.

-AVADA KEDAVR...

Hermione was spelling avada kedavra on herself to suicide! But Harry came quickly inside the room and took her wand from her hands before she could say the last A of Kedavra.

-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO -Said while avoiding her suiciding.

Harry said to Hermione while she cried and cried:

-Look, I love you, but now I love Draco more, he just made me feel things that I never felt before, he loves me and we want to be together forever.

Hermione was crying, the swot said:

-I love you too, and I loved Draco too but I chose you over him, you can't do this to me! I dont want to live, LET ME DIE!

The silverhaired guy came in too, he grabbed Hermione's face and with his heart suffering because he made her cry, he said:

-Come on, don't suicide, I know you love him, but being single is great too! You have to be feminist!

The brownhaired girl said:

-You don't understand, we have to be together because I'm having Harry's baby inside me!

And she cried even more, the two males stared at each other. Harry didn't know that.  
>-But Hermione, we didn't have sex!<p>

-I know, but it was all a Conception charm

Flashback 3 moths ago-

Someone ordered a potion to Snape, a potion that only him knew how to do, he had it on his hands when he saw Hermione pass next to him and he tried to touch her ass. Hermione turned around to hit him, but she hit the bottle, and it fell on her. Snape said: you will get pregnant from the next person you touch. So she ran to touch Harry because if she has to have a baby, she wants it to be only his and no one else than the love of her life, so she touches him and in that moment she got pregnant, and she has in her tummy identical twins, a girl and a boy.

End of flashback-

Harry doesn't know what to do because he doesn't love Hermione anymore and he wants to be with Malfoy, only with him, and with no one else. For a second he wished that the bottle fell on him and touched Draco so the baby would be his and his love.

-What can we do? I'm gonna become a father!

Harry doesn't know what to do, is a hard decision...

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Chapter 2

This chapter is a song fic, the cursive part is the song, it's in African because my country won the world cup, that was in Africa.

Harry was thinking a handful of different things and feelings at the same time. He didn't know what to do, he was between two loves, his four months love and the new one, but suddenly he noticed he loved Malfoy more than his broom or his dead mother, so he chose him.

Jy is 'n goeie soldaat Die keuse van jou oorlo Kies self tot En stof jouself af En terug in die tuig

With suffering, torment, and torture he said to the frizzyhead:

-I don't love you, but let's do something: you give me the babies and Malfoy and me will look after them, with a spell we transfer them to my tummy so you can be feminist and stop being upset.

Hermione agreed, so did the Hogwart's bad boy.

-I love you my darling. We'll be very happy with our two babies fruit of our love.

Hermione, who knew a lot of spells, made a spell to transfer the babies to Harry's tummy, and in that moment she noticed they were not only two, a boy and a girl, they were three, one of each gender, but either way they'd love them a lot.

Harry ate pregnant's food, and had breakfast three times a day, and he had for breakfast: toast, eggs, natural orange juice, unbromated bread, low fat butter, multifruit puree, breast milk, and beef because he didn't like any other kind of meat. And he was wearing jeans, a maternity blouse because his tummy was massive, his gryffindor scarf and a ring of gold and diamonds that Malfoy gave him for being his uke.

They moved to a shack near Hagrid that Dumbledore gave them so they can have privacy and nobody else can watch them making love and having sex.

9 months later Harry gave birth

Jy is op die frontlinie Almal se kyk Jy weet dit is ernstige Ons is amper klaar Hierdie isnt oor

-Ahhhh help me! This is your fault! -Shouted Harry as loud as he could while his love Draco grabbed his hand

-Calm down sweethart, this will be over in a minute, pull! PULL!

He wa cheering Harry to pull harder. Two minutes later the three babies came out. They named the first one Harry jr, the second was named Draco jr and the third one was named Dramonie.

Harry jr was: silver haired, green eyes and very skinny, his weight was roughly 3 Kg.

Draco jr was: Very skinny, his hair was curly and black with brown eyes

Dramonie was: Straight short hair the same colour as Miley Cyrus, but he wasnt a boy nor a girl.

They went back home with their children, but they didnt know something: Snape was sure those babies didn't belong to Harry and Draco. Only to him and Hermione, and he wanted them to teach them how to be death eaters.

Die druk is op Jy voel dit Maar jy het dit alles Glo dit Jy is 'n goeie soldaat Die keuse van jou oorlo Kies self tot En stof jouself af En terug in die tuig Jy is op die frontlinie Almal se kyk Jy weet dit is ernstige Ons is amper klaar Hierdie isnt oor

TO BE CONTINUED 


	3. Chapter 3

Harry and Draco (the love of his life) were breastfeeding their babies during potions class while Snape glared at them with hate and vengeful wrath because he believed those were only his and Hermione babies who loved since 5 months ago.

Harry breastfeeded Dramonie, and Malfoy with face of pissed off butcher breastfeeded Harry jr and Draco jr, one in each breast.

Hermione was writting in her feminist diary and ignoring Snape, she hated him with all her heart because he gave her bad grades and touched her ass since 5 months ago and she didn't know why.

The oily teacher looked at the frizzyhead with love and hate because she gave HIS babies to Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy respectively but he was pretty sure at least one of the babies was his and he shouldn't be named Harry jr, should be called Severus Snape jr2, because his dad's name was also Severus Snape, so Severus Snape jr 1 would be himself.

Snape said to Hermione when he saw her alone:

-Bad stupid girl, you gave MY babies to that Potter guy that I hate.

Hermione replied:

-NO! They are not yours! I would never touch an ugly weirdo like you! -she souted out loud and the wind blew her hair as if she was in a boat, making her look sexy, and Snape liked it and tried to rape her but he didn't notice they were on the edge of a precipice!

And Hermione fell down and down, slow and heavily rolling and hitting stones and rocks, bruising her body like a granny smith apple because she didn't have a broom to go away flying like in Harry Potter and the Goblet of fire.

-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO -Severus Snape screamed

-I killed her! But whatever, I will get my babies back -Said with evil face, and he moved his cape like super heros do when they leave, and left.

Hermione's nose and face were bleeding, her face was deformed due to the hits she got falling. She cried because all her body hurt and she thought she was dead, but she wasn't! She was alive but deformed.

She picked up her mirror and looked, her nose lacked a tiny bit and was flattened like a wild boar, her forehead was wide and almost bald like Sakura from Naruto, her ears were bigger and her body was bruised all over like a Japanese watermelon and she looked like Courtney Love.

She wasn't beautiful and lovely anymore like she was, and she swore revenge with vengeful wrath of hate and furious rage. To prevent someone recognize her, she put a cat's mask on her face and she left to plan her revenge.

A month later...

The babies were crawling, and Harry like euphoric mommy hen tried to chase them because they crawled everywhere. Harry jr and Draco jr loved a lot each other, their daddies noticed they loved each other with all the romantic love one can love someone, and they knew they'd be together when they grew up just like them. Dramonie noticed it too and he or she was jealous because they didn't love him, and he loved secretly one of his siblings...

And that's how hate and vengeful fury grew up like a seed of bitter lemon in the heart of Dramonie. Maybe he joins Snape? Could be, but you will have to read my next update to know it.

TO BE CONTINUED


End file.
